The iceman cometh

The phrase splash it all over at Christmas time usually conjures up images of Henry Cooper and Brut, at least for those of a certain age. Not for those in Allen & Overys corporate department, however, at least since its riotous Christmas party. The bash featured a life-size vodka luge that was what can only be described as well-hung (and we dont mean from the wall). Apparently, the positioning of the frozen fella caused much of the vodka to hit drinkers faces instead of their throats.

For the uninitiated, a vodka luge is an ice sculpture with a hole from which revellers sup the see-through spirit. In this case, the hole was on the end of a remarkably lifelike schlong.

The chilly chap doesnt seem to have gone down well with one anonymous attendee, who addressed Tulkinghorn thus: “At the bar there was an ice sculpture consisting of a figures upper body, complete with penis. You can probably imagine what the penis was for delivering vodka shots to willing drinkers. Although there were many takers (particularly among the ladies), I for one found it deeply offensive and completely inappropriate. I would be interested to know how management can possibly justify this.”

There is no way of knowing whether Disgusted is actually from Tunbridge Wells, but its a fair bet the mystery mitherer was one of the 30,000 viewers that moaned to the BBC about Jerry Springer: The Opera. As far as A&Os iceman goes, unfortunately the management preferred not to talk about the shenanigans, but then theres already been enough said about the corporate teams lacklustre performance recently. Perhaps with so much poor technique and lost liquid on display, they were simply too embarrassed to comment.